Things Your Dog Doesn't Want You to Know

Things Your Dog Doesn't Want You to Know

3.79 (206 ratings by Goodreads)
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Dear Human:

Your dog probably puzzles you. Most of us do that. And most of us would like to keep things as they are: humans in the dark, dogs with the upper hand.

But we dogs are about to let you in a little secret. Okay, a lot of secrets.

We graduated first in our obedience class three times. This should tell you something. Puppies know that they're being cute. They're using you. We don't sound anything like those silly voices you use to imitate us. We hate those ridiculous names you give some of us. Moonbeam is not a dignified name for a mutt. You might want to check your herb garden for fertilizer. We are only wearing this stupid birthday hat so we can get some cake. No self-respecting dog cares about his birthday. We are not spoiled, certainly not in comparison to teenage girls. We are in charge of the house. We let you pretend that you are. We'd be lost without you. We love you.

It's all in our new book, Things Your Dog Doesn't Want You To Know, as told to humans Hy Conrad and Jeff Johnson. Even Steve Martin (yes, THAT Steve Martin) raves about us! Inside you'll find revelations such as the reason we at the sofa (leather tastes very similar to rawhide), and what we really think of the costumes you dress us up in.

I'm not alone. Ten other courageous canines have stepped forward to tell you what your dog won't - every last dirty, hairy bit of it. If you have dogs, love dogs, or have ever been baffled by a dog, this book is a must-have.
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Product details

  • Paperback | 240 pages
  • 140 x 216 x 15.24mm | 431g
  • Naperville, United States
  • English
  • 1402263287
  • 9781402263286
  • 316,145

Review quote

"What a charming and funny book this was. A very entertaining and light read. As a dog lover I found myself chuckling and nodding in agreement at some of the antics and views of the dogs" - Chocolate Chunky Munkie
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Rating details

206 ratings
3.79 out of 5 stars
5 31% (64)
4 30% (61)
3 30% (62)
2 6% (12)
1 3% (7)

Our customer reviews

I don't know how many of you know this but I'm a huge animal lover, at the last count we had 2 gerbils, 3 hamsters, 2 cats, 2 budgies and 1 golden retriever in our house that goes by the name of Annie so when my favourite book tour company sent me an invite for this book I just had to have it. The day I got it I remember flipping through it randomly and laughing hysterically with my mother who though the book from what she saw was the cutest thing. It also got the kiss of approval from Annie (She licks everything!). So once I got Annie's approval I knew it would be a great book and it was. I mean if you're looking for a serious read and came upon this then you took a wrong turn at Albuquerque Doc. This book had me giggling and laughing hysterically from page one. I loved all the dogs and their little journalish entries. Each dog had their own unique little personalities or in the case of some of the dogs big personalities. I loved the cleverness of the book. I love how the book was written in such a way that the reader could put it down whenever they felt like it (but let's be honest who would want to put it down?). It's a great book to read when you're a bit down, if it's a cloudy day or if you just want to have a laugh and think about what your dog might say about you if they were able to talk. I would recommend this book to everyone but especially the animal lovers out there, this would make the perfect birthday or Christmas present because it has something for all ages to enjoy. I know that I'm going to have a hard time getting my copy back from my mom because she likes it so much! So what are you waiting for folks?! Go get your copy!! *I received a free copy in exchange for my free and honest review. I was not compensated in any way and all thoughts and opinions expressed therein are my more
by Kimberly Roy
What a charming and funny book this was. A very entertaining and light read. As a dog lover I found myself chuckling and nodding in agreement at some of the antics and views of the dogs. My Chocolate Labrador doesn't need to learn any new tricks he pretty much could have written the book. Especially the part where one dog said he was constantly hungry and was never full...... mmm... I know a certain pooch who could certainly relate to that. This book is not overly long; I do wish it went on for longer as I was really enjoying the antics and stories of the dogs. This is my only criticism. The layout was so refreshing it was colourful and quirky. It really was a joy to pore over the pages. At first I thought this book would be good for children too, but there was one dog story in there that wasn't quite suitable. I like how the book first of all introduces all the dogs and gives a brief and hysterical description of their lives; there were some really sweet and nutty dogs mixed in. This would be a good present to give a dog lover. I know I would have loved it as a gift!!show more
by Jennifer Juckes
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