Judge's Library; A Monthly Magazine of Fun Volume 70-81

Judge's Library; A Monthly Magazine of Fun Volume 70-81

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This historic book may have numerous typos and missing text. Purchasers can usually download a free scanned copy of the original book (without typos) from the publisher. Not indexed. Not illustrated. 1895 edition. Excerpt: ...you could scratch a match now all right; couldn't you, Miss May?" THE CHEESE MARKET. Country Parson--" I don't like to say nothin', deacon, but that cheese you sent me for your year's pew rent wuz powerful poor. Deacon--" P'r'aps it wuz, parson; but so wuz the oreachin'." THE BICYCLE FIEND. Bronco PETE--" Thetthar man thar has killed more'n fifty people." Tenderfoot--"Goodness! Why is he allowed at liberty?" Bronco Pete--" Wai, yer see he killed 'em kinder accidentally. He's been larnin" ter ride er bicycle." OBJECT-LESSON ON THE CHAIR. Teacher (having directed the attention of the class to the various parts of a chair)--"Of what use is the seat in a chair?" Bright little girl (who knows it all)--" I know." Teacher--" You may tell the class." Bright little girl--" To keep people from flopping on the floor." GENEROUS MAN. First business-man--" I understand old Gripem left a lot of money. Did he leave any of it for charitable purposes?" Second business-man--" Yes; left it all to his children. They are all grown men." First business-man--" But how is that charity?" Second business-man--" Keeps some one else from taking care of them." REV. MOAKLEY McKOON ON THE BICYCLE. "They shall justle one another on the streets they shall run like the lightnings."--Nahum ll., 4. Bredren, evidentually dat means de bicycle. Dat is de man dat carries his stummick between his shoulder-blades an' his face on de top of his haid, an' his trousers has to be cut wid a buzz-saw. He gits a hump on his back like a Russian Jew pack-peddler an' walks like a knee-sprung turkey on a stony road. He cometh up like a flower an'...show more

Product details

  • Paperback
  • 189 x 246 x 3mm | 113g
  • Rarebooksclub.com
  • United States
  • English
  • black & white illustrations
  • 1236785509
  • 9781236785503