I Suck at Girls

I Suck at Girls

3.78 (16,037 ratings by Goodreads)
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From the #1 New York Times bestseller author of Sh*t My Dad Says, Justin Halpern, comes a laugh-out-loud funny and deeply touching collection of personal stories about relationships with the opposite sex, from a first kiss to getting engaged and all the awkward moments in between. With Sh*t My Dad Says, Halpern brought his brand of talented comedic writing to the world. Now, with this equally poignant, hilarious, and provocative memoir, he establishes himself as one of popular writing's great humorists among the likes of David Sedaris, Sarah Vowell, and David Rakoff. Fans of biting, honor-infused memoirs such as Me Talk Pretty One Day and Assassination Vacation will find Halpern's I Suck at Girls an unforgettable journey into the best and worst moments of one man's adventures in romance.
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Product details

  • CD-Audio | 4 pages
  • 132 x 146 x 20mm | 113.4g
  • New York, NY, United States
  • English
  • Unabridged
  • Unabridged
  • 0062201646
  • 9780062201645
  • 1,535,641

Back cover copy

"Human beings fear the unknown. So, whatever's freaking you out, grab it by the balls and say hello. Then it ain't the unknown anymore and it ain't scary. Or I guess it could be a shitload scarier."

Fans of the #1 bestseller Sh*t My Dad Says will recognize the always patient voice of Justin Halpern's dad as it crackles through this hysterical new audiobook. The story begins when Justin announces that he's decided to propose to his girlfriend. "You've been dating her for four years," his dad replies. "It ain't like you found a parallel fucking universe."

But eventually he gives Justin some advice: that he should think back over everything he's learned in life about women, relationships, and himself before making his decision. And that's just what Justin does--revisiting everything from his disastrous childhood crushes to the night he finally lost his virginity while working as a dishwasher at Hooters.

Full of his dad's patented brand of wisdom, it's also full of new characters just as funny--from his brother, who provides insights into wedding night rituals, to his first boss, who warns Justin to man up: "That's what a man does. He takes his shots and then he scrubs the shit out of some dishes." The result is a pilgrim's progress through the landscape of sex and love--by one of the funniest writers at work today.

Read by Sean Schemmel
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Rating details

16,037 ratings
3.78 out of 5 stars
5 25% (4,037)
4 39% (6,184)
3 28% (4,483)
2 6% (1,039)
1 2% (294)

Our customer reviews

A few years back I read the author's previous book Sh!t My Dad Says and loved it. I thought it was hilarious outrageous, witty and gritty so when I saw that Justin Halpern had a second book out I knew I had to read it. I Suck at Girls was yet another hilarious book where Justin Halpern dishes on his personal life and is filled with wonderfully sage advice from his father who is in his mid-seventies who tells it like it is whether people want to hear it or not. In I Suck at Girls we get an even more intimate glance into the life of Justin Halpern as he dishes about the time he lost his virginity, first got dumped, went overseas and moved out on his own and all the other disastrous moments in his life in between. I'm a huge fan of the author's and I love how readily he is willing to talk about his personal life. Many of the experiences he share are the typical coming of age stories that many of us probably experience though we may not all have a father like his. The book was a quick read but I loved every second of it. It had me laughing out loud almost the entire time that I read it and I literally had tears rolling down my face in some parts. While I really enjoyed it, it wasn't as funny as Sh!t My Dad Says but that's okay with me. Both books are really different from each other so it's a little harder to compare them. Overall, it was funny, easy to read and entertaining. I would recommend this to anyone who has read Sh!t My Dad Says and of course those who haven't. I really hope that Justin Halpern writes another book because I'm dying to hear more witty remarks from his dad.show more
by Kimberly Roy
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