The Clockmaker; Or, the Sayings and Doings of Samuel Slick, of Slickville
Excerpt: ...right up to that yard by the neck, by Gum. Well, it rub'd all the writin out of his face, as quick as spittin on a slate takes a sum out, you may depend. Now, they should rig up a crane over the street door of the State house at Halifax, and when any of the pilots at either eend of the buildin, run 'em on the breakers on purpose, string em up like an onsafe dog. A sign of that are kind, with "a house of public entertainment," painted under it, would do the business in less than no time. If it would'nt keep the hawks out of the poultry yard, it's a pity-it would scare them out of a year's growth, that's a fact-if they used it once, I guess they would'nt have occasion for it agin in a hurry-it would be like the Aloe tree, and that bears fruit only once in a hundred years. If you want to know how to act any time, squire, never go to books, leave them to galls and school boys; but go right off and cypher it out of natur, that's a sure guide, it will never deceive you, you may depend. For instance, "what's that to me," is a phrase so common that it shows it's a natural one, when people have no particular interest in a thing. Well, when a feller gets so warm on either side as never to use that phrase at all, watch him, that's all! keep your eye on him, or he'll walk right into you afore you know where you be. If a man runs to me and says, "your fence is down," thank you, says I, that's kind-if he comes agin and says, "I guess some stray cattle have broke into your short sarce garden," I thank him again; says I, come now, this is neighborly; but when he keeps etarnally tellin me this thing of one sarvant, and that thing of another sarvant, hints that my friends ant true, that my neighbors are inclined to take advantage of me, and that suspicious folks are seen about my place, I say to myself, what on airth makes this critter take such a wonderful interest in my affairs? I don't like to hear such tales-he's arter somethin as sure as the world, if...
- Paperback | 60 pages
- 189 x 246 x 3mm | 127g
- 13 Sep 2013
- Illustrations, black and white