So Now You're a Zombie
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So Now You're a Zombie : A Handbook for the Newly Undead

By (author) John Austin

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Being undead can be disorienting. Your arms and other appendages tend to rot and fall off. It s difficult to communicate with a vocabulary limited to moans and gurgles. And that smell! (Yes, it s "you.") But most of all, you must constantly find and ingest human brains. Braaaains!!! What s a zombie to do? Thankfully, zombiologist John Austin details everything you need to know, as a newly undead soul, to hunt, fight, and feed on the living. As the first handbook written specifically for the undead, "So Now You re a Zombie" explains how you ended up in this predicament, the stages of zombification, and what you need to survive in this zombiphobic world. Dozens of helpful diagrams outline attack strategies, such as the Ghoul Reach, the Flanking Zack, the Bite Hold, and the Aerial Fall, to secure your human prey. You ll even learn how to successfully extract the living from boarded up farmhouses and broken down vehicles. This handbook also explores the upside of being a zombie. Gone are the burdens of employment, taxes, social networks, even basic hygiene, allowing you to focus on simple necessities in life: the juicy gray matter found in the skulls of the living."

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  • Paperback | 224 pages
  • 152.4 x 226.06 x 15.24mm | 317.51g
  • 17 Nov 2010
  • Zephyr Press
  • Arizona
  • English
  • 150 b/w illus
  • 1569763429
  • 9781569763421
  • 50,095

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Author Information

John Austin is the author of "MiniWeapons of Mass Destruction," "Cubical Warfare, " and "Prank"" University."For more information, visithttp: //www.johnaustinbooks.com/zombie.html"

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Review quote

"Everything a new flesh eater needs to know about surviving in a world where you only want one thing: brains." "--Geek-span.com""

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